The Hitchhiker’s Guide to Gaza

There’s a scene in the book series by Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, where a couple of characters, Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect, land on a lovely and only recently occupied planet. The new occupants, Earthlings who have just arrived on the Edenic Earth-like world, are embroiled in a heated political argument over some bureaucratic dilemma as they go about setting up their own government system.

Hamas Tunnels destroyed by Israel

Hamas Tunnels destroyed by Israel

Arthur and Ford, without knowing what the point of contention is, watch the group fight, thrashing out the no doubt grave issue with vehement ardor until finally, Arthur can take no more. He jumps in, quieting the tumultuous crowd.

“People, please, please,” Arthur cries, holding his hands up to the furious gathering. When they quiet down to a mere grumbling, then to silence as they focus on him, he tells them, “If you want to settle the matter, you need to stop the anger and vitriol. You need to listen, hear the other man’s point of view, try to see his perspective. As good as you think you’re ideas are, his ideas are just as valid. Consider the other guy’s philosophies and thoughts instead of simply yelling back and forth, criticizing each other?”

When he’s done, a woman faces him full on, her arms folded, eyes boring into him with impatient irritation. With a condescending stare, she says, “Okay Mr. I.Q., you’re so smart, you tell us what color the money should be.”

Arthur looked at Ford, Ford looked at Arthur, then they both did their best to thumb a ride out of there.

If I remember correctly there are four or five books in the series, all with this sort of dry, quirky, out-of-nowhere humor. I use the scene to show that the Israeli/Palestinian conflict, or rather, those reporting on it, mirror the same absurdity. Thing is, the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy is comical, but sadly, the middle east situation is tragic.

And the mainstream media seem to be arguing over monetary pigments.


Hamas has in its charter the annihilation of the Jews.


Hamas leader, Khaled Meshaal said to a cheering crowd of Gazans, “Palestine is ours, from the river to the sea and from the south to the north. There will be no concession on an inch of the land.”


The Palestinians have allied themselves with Hamas giving them control of their government.


Hamas make it a practice to use women and children as cover while firing at the enemy.


It is a routine tactic for Hamas to kidnap women and children, holding them hostage.


Even though Israel has sent warnings to Gaza in advance before they fire their response, giving the citizens time to vacate for safety, the Palestinian leadership have told the people to stay in their homes, waiting for the bombs to hit them to serve a political advantage.


The American mainstream media are in a full press, not giving up, relentless in asking the bold, hard questions, like . . . why are the Israelis so cruel.

Israel drops flyers from the sky telling the people that they will be bombing that area. They check to make sure that they are strategically aiming at non-civilians areas when they retaliate against an attack from Gaza. As mentioned, they send advanced warnings, non-lethal rockets to a section they are targeting in order to let the people know that the facility that sent the initial attacking rockets will be destroyed, giving any innocent people time to escape.

But the question that Jake Tapper put Israeli spokesman, Mark Regev was why the Israelis are killing Palestinian children?

Hey Jake, got the answer for ya. It’s revealed in a recording of Gaza’s Interior Ministry telling the people to stay in their homes when the Israeli bombs are heading for them, essentially saying, let your children die for a global-political benefit.

When the question came up as to why those in Gaza put women and children in munitions storehouses when they know those will be targets of Israeli retaliation, Hilary Clinton said,

The problem is, and this is something – I’m not a military planner, but Hama puts its missiles, its rockets in civilian areas, part of it is is that Gaza’s pretty small and its densely populated. They put their command and control of Hamas military leaders in those civilian areas..

Ahhhh, I see, madame Secretary. Small kids are shoved into buildings housing rockets and other firepower because, well, you see, we don’t have a lot of room, and, well, we just don’t have anywhere else to put little Tagia and Abdul.

Arthur and Ford would be staring at each other, right about now.

Is Hilary Clinton actually that stupid, or is it that she thinks we’re that stupid?

I’ve asked that question before, but it seems to be aggressively warranted with the smartest woman in the world. Or so she has been called. This is the woman who – supposedly – was duped by her husband, Bill Clinton, publicly saying the whole Lewinsky charge was nothing more than a,

“. . . vast right-wing conspiracy.”

If you are a shallow thinker, then you’re probably asking the same questions that our media are asking, wondering why those poor peace-loving Gaza citizens are being so ill-treated by those horrible war mongering Jews.

In The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy’s, Arthur Dent and his cosmic companion, Ford Prefect, hitched a ride, beating it as fast as they could off that doomed planet.

Think I’ll see if Seti will let me send a radio-transmission of a thumb sticking high in the region of Polaris.

About the Author

Joe Keck is a writer of horror, thriller, suspense, and other fiction, some poetry and music, with the occasional op-ed piece on current events, politics, and theology. Although born in Oklahoma, he was taken to Los Angeles when he was an infant, or as his mother described, "the ugliest little thing I've ever seen", and raised there on the West Coast. He considers himself to be far superior to most on the artistic merits of film and literature, seeing the vast majority of such to be well below adequate. He has four novels and many short stories to his credit, and hopes to one day have them published, promising to hold critics like himself in harsh derision. He's currently restoring a Jason 35 sailboat and plans to sail the world, writing horror stories, and marveling at the illustrative works of the Creator and His Divine story-telling imagery. You may Find Joe's Website at

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