Boxing Match Decides Fate of Nations (Crimea and Ukraine)

Putin and Obama Trade Punches

Putin and Obama Trade Punches

Satire: Breakdown in diplomacy and threats has left the fate of Crimea and Ukraine in the hands of a boxing match between Putin and Obama. 10 rounds have been decided but Bookies are putting the match to be finished in under 2 rounds! Bookies don’t understand Obama’s message to the world: I-am-your-friend-and America-is-not-me-America’s weakness is your strength! In the first round for Crimea, a small peninsula on the southern border of Ukraine and not far from Russia, Putin delivered a massive punch which almost knocked Obama out. However, Obama quickly recovered, went and played a few rounds of basketball with his buddies at the White House, came back refreshed, forgot about the boxing ring called Putin instead. The hour long conversation went nowhere and all Obama heard were the alphabets FU! So a second round was scheduled and lo and behold, Putin, the bare chested horse rider delivered another punch; Crimea went to Russia. Obama quickly retreated to the White House.

In the third round, Obama rolled up his sleeves on his skinny arms, put on some delicate gloves made by Michelle Obama and went on bravely to the ring to face the rascal Putin again. Obama threw the first punch of some sanctions which in reality were merely soft pats and did not make a single dent in Putin’s KGB iron frame. Putin deftly deflected Obama’s punches and quickly sent some forces into Ukraine. Obama, instead of coming back, got distracted by the only well fed North Korean, Kim Jong-Un and Iran’s bearded men, the Ayatollahs. Actually, both North Korea and Iran should have been banned from this very important boxing match just because these two nations did not believe in people having fun of any kind except where young boys were involved! In this round, Putin was able to fight with one hand and with the other hand, was able to direct Russian traffic heading towards Ukraine. Putin won this round again and as a gift to his nation directed some entertainment hubs to be set up immediately. BBC reported there were gambling dens to be set up with Russian flags.

Before the fourth round began, Obama called Putin again and once more heard some sighing on the Russian side and perhaps heard the same words FU again. Surely, Putin couldn’t be saying that, Obama thought. Confirmed reports stated that yes indeed, Putin had uttered those dreaded words! When the fourth round got over, Putin experienced a pang of sympathy for those silly Americans who never seem to be understand the f-word. So, Putin did what he thought was best, gave Obama a medium punch on his nose. A little blood was lost and Obama retired to the White House for some freshly brewed coffee. Ukraine is almost in Russian claws. The match has been postponed indefinitely till Obama calls Putin the third time to finalize some details of the next rounds. Boxing Experts say the match between Obama and Putin may have to be rounded off pre-maturely because of the apparent one-sidied punches. As the unofficial winner, Putin has successfully crossed into both Crimea and Ukraine and has put some conditions before the remainder of the boxing match can resume: Obama should at least learn to ride a horse instead of a bicycle!

About the Author

Politisite Human Interest Editor: Joyce is a graduate in Films and Communications and has found herself gravitating to writing with an increasing fervor. She has made short documentaries for Unicef and Indian TV. Joyce joined Politisite and writes regularly for Yahoo, Allvoices and her Blog on politics, religion, spirituality, family, cultural idiosyncrasies and anything else that catches her fancy. Joyce believes humor to be an essential ingredient of life and loves art, poetry and books. She is also a Homeopath and does Homeopathic consultations (alternative medicine).

Author Archive Page

Post a Comment